Thursday, October 4, 2012

Pink, Link and the Garden of Love

An interesting variation on the Pink and Link arc might be if Pink and Link were bisexual, and decided to get revenge on Shampoo by having sex with both her and her "husband" Ranma. They reason that most married couples wouldn't be able to handle the memory of watching their spouse willingly having sex with someone else right in front of them.

So instead of growing a poisonous forest at Furinkan, they grow a forest of aphrodisiacal plants. Ranma and Shampoo start to succumb, and each go down on one of the girls. Akane, believing the plants to be poisonous, comes in to the rescue as in canon. She finds Ranma with his mouth buried between Link's legs, bashes him in fury, and drags him away. Meanwhile the effect of the plants is fighting its way past her natural defenses. Ranma wakes up just as she's reaching the point of giving in to resistance (or maybe he even wakes up a little after Akane gives in). The pair of them start going at it with all the (loud) forcefulness of martial artists.

Back at the center of the forest, Pink and Link shrug their shoulders, figure they shouldn't let what they have go to waste, and have a very long and thorough session with Shampoo. Who ends up deciding that she likes girls better than boys, and that her two former rivals make better lovers than enemies.

When Akane and Ranma finally finish, they pick themselves up weakly and prepare to stumble their way out of the forest. Whereupon they discover that their lust-filled minds had failed to notice that they were almost at the edge. And just beyond the edge is a crowd containing everyone they know, who have been watching - and listening - to the entire show they just put on. Everyone gives them a huge round of applause (with the exception of a resigned Cologne) and the fathers put on (happily) stern faces and insist that now the two of them must get married immediately, to which an equally stern (and madly blushing) Kasumi adds her vote.

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